Dreams do come true

    Well as most everyone know by know... that Drew and I are about to embark upon the greatest blessing and challenge of our future; parenthood. I have wanted this for so long and have dreamt of this day for years and years.
             I still remember the nights I cried silent tears to myself wishing I could be a mother. I remember the dozens of single pink lines I threw in the garbage in frustration. And in one moment that all changed. New Years Day morning I awake and I knew it was time for my monthly pee on a stick. I had already made up my mind that it was not my time and not to get my hopes up to much. Two minutes later I was screaming in disbelief and shock as I finally saw those 2 pink lines.  I have never felt such utter and complete elation.
          Its been 8 and a half months since that glorious day and I have since then experianced all the many wonderful moments of pregnancy. All the aches and pains. The dozens of trips to the little girls room, and the blessed flutters and kicks of my little baby. I sometimes get wrapped up in the small nuisances of pregnancy but overall I have completely falling in love with my little baby boy. I still just sit and grin to watch him kick and bounce across my big belly.  I am truly blessed and unbelievably thankful for this blessing in my life. I do believe we have picked out a name for my little boy and we will call him Lucas Andrew.

            Little Lucas will be here with us within the next 3 weeks and I can barely stand the anticipation at this point. I can not wait to meet him and begin the next chapter of our lives. I love him so much already I just cant imagine life without him, and he's not even in my arms yet. I have been so blessed and not a day goes by that I don't thank my father in heaven for bringing us this little boy. I also have to say that all those shooting stars and days and days of wishing for my own little one at 11:11 were not in vain. lol :)

Total Late night Rant!

So I know blogs are suppose to be happy and uplifting, but tonight so not my goal. I have had one of the most stressful and scary months of my life ...(no need to go into details at this time) but it bothers me so much and makes me plain angry how people can turn their heads and walk away.

      I have a few very close people that I talk to when things in life are rough and I guess I should realize by now that a certain saying should being my motto for a while.

             I hold certain people so close to my heart. They are kind and compassionate and seem to say the right things, but just as easy they forget you. I can not comprehend how my "best friends" have been to me lately. I call them crying and pooring some of the deepest things to them and then I dont hear a word for over two weeks. I dont understand it. It hurts and makes me angry and more than anything I am finally realizing that it is not because of my flaws but because of theirs. They are simply wrapped up in their own lives. They care when its convieniant and want to appear a great deal more compassionate than that which truly resides in their heart.   On the flip side I do see who are my true friends and really care. I find love and compassion in places I didn't expect it or look for it first. Its true what they say for sure thou... Family is always there. Whether it's my wonderful sister, cousin, or an unexpected inlaw; I am thankful for the angels here on earth.

The meaning of Christmas

    We got to go home for Christmas this year and be together! It is amazing how much more it meant to me to just to be together and to be with our families. I got to meet my other brother in-laws and their fiances. Zack and Josh are just delightful men. I felt more a part of the family than I ever thought I would that fast. The Girton's always welcome us with more love and care than ever anticipated. I just love my In-law family!
         On Christmas Eve we went to my brother Zacks house for appetizers, presents, and the much anticipated Fireworks!! I couldn't wait; I couldn't wait to see everyone open what I got them, to see the smiles on those kids faces. To see the love in our family that is the meaning of Christmas to me. To finish the evening off we lit these huge fireworks off that I got from Wyoming. The kids were screaming and squelling. Oh it was simply priceless. At the end of the evening we went back to Jeff and Lori's house. Everyone was sitting around in their pjs just waiting for us to get home so we could open ours. After putting our new pjs on I began to share a Larsen tradition with my other family. The Christmas Orange Story. Its a very touching story that has been told to me as a child and I have continued it as my own tradition. As I read this story Drew stood near by peeling  one medium orange to split amongst the 9 of us sitting around. Upon finishing a story I have read or heard more than a dozen times I broke down in tears. My Father came to mind and his great spirit of Christmas that he held in his heart. He was so inspiring to me about what we need to remember each Christmas season. This holiday is about the birth of Christ and the sacrafices he made for us. Its about giving not recieving. Its about Family! I love my families so much and so blessed to have all that I have! I am sad that its already the new year, just because I love Christmas so much!!
            I was horrible about taking pictures this trip, so when I gather what I took I will add them.